Growing up in my part of the world

If you grew up perfectly in Nigeria, you don’t know what God has done for you. To crown it all, being a girl child….

Parents make you do things with the phrase “…as a girl…” Or “…when you get to your husband’s house…” These phrases in particular totally turn me off. I mean, I’m not going through all these stress only to end up in ..”husband’s house”☠️

On the bus back from the market one day, i sat behind two women. They looked like they were in their early fifties. Turned out their daughters graduated from the same high school. I overheard their conversation. Not like i was eavesdropping though, but they were loud. SMH, Yoruba women.

One of the women (say Mrs A) was telling the other woman (say Mrs Z), how her daughter had finally gained admission to study industrial physics in the University of Lagos. Mrs Z congratulated her and was like “Thank God for you o. Before you know it, four years will be over and then, the next thing is to go and choose “aso-ebi” (Yoruba word for matching party clothes) in the market” ☠️☠️☠️

I was so irritated. The fact that many other women, not just Mrs A and Mrs Z, fall into this category is baffling . The typical cycle. Elementary school, high school, University and then, boom! Marriage.

They have zero interests in whatever you want to do with your life, so far after school is marriage. My mom is not like that and I’m so glad. Although, she expects that marriage should be on my radar. Not like I’m against getting married but I don’t subscribe to the stereotypical idea behind it. Girls have a particular age where they’re expected to be married and once they’re in that age bracket, there’s this pressure they’re placed under by society to “settle down”.

I think before walking down the aisle, man or woman, there are certain heights you should have attained. Personally, i don’t plan to get married if i don’t have a stable financial life or source of income basically. I don’t want my kids to suffer. And there are so many other places I’d like to develop myself in before taking that very huge step.

Anyways, this is just the snippet of the cons of growing up in my side of the world.